Page Three

This is my new piece 'Page Three'. 

Art

Frieze art fair. Who went? I didn't although I probably should have. I did try to skeef my way into the VIP but was too late and quite frankly not VIP enough.  I DID however skeef my way into ZOO which really ought to be in a Zoo because apart from cats and cream teas, Zoos really are my most favourite thing (although we could argue they are quite immoral, but hey ho I just love animals). Anyway as usual I had quite a 'shrugging my shoulders' response to everything. To me it did not have the za za zoo (as Carrie Bradshaw would say).  

The thing with me is that although art is the most important thing in my life, I also have a feeling of huge indifference to the majority of it. When I was at art school I spent most of the time with a perplexed look on my face because I didn't understand anything anyone else was going on about. I used to get really upset and think the art world was not for me and that I was stupid. My painting 'Green Chair' was about this.

So when people say things like 'Oh I don't like art' or 'I don't get art' I totally understand, I don't get most of it either. And I'm an artist!

Maybe these people who don't 'get art' will be looking at, say, a sculpture of a black blob, are expecting too much or looking too much into things. Like if it is art it must have some higher power in some way and elevate us to some Keats-eque transcendent truth. No wonder they're confused. Maybe it's just a sculpture of a black blob.

Art can have the best feeling in the whole world when it really touches you. It's only happened twice to me. Firstly when I saw the statue of David in Florence when I saw 16. As it was a school trip I was trapesing around all bored, when I turned the corner, there it was. I was so overcome with awe that it filled me with the most fantastic feeling that there are beautiful and amazing things in the world. The second time was when I saw the solo exhibition by Stella Vine at Modern Art Oxford. Now THAT was a bizarre feeling, I was so overcome I had to sit down and take a moment. There is just something so beautiful and innocent and wonderful about her work. With it all around me was too much, I was shaking. An experience like that is what I love about art.

There is a bizarre snobbery which I think is quite amusing. If you say to someone you're an art student they almost want to spit on you for being a lazy drop out. But at the same time everyone sees art in general as something really cultured or elitist or only for the rich and clever. Also, art that is seen to be liked by the masses e.g. Vettriano is really snubbed. I'm not personally a fan but if people are connecting with this work in some way and are out in the masses buying his prints there MUST be some merit somewhere? When I went to Edinburgh festival in August, Jamie and I had a bet. He reckoned that a Vettriano would definately be in the National Gallery of Scotland and I bet a ridiculous amount of money due to my absolute certainty that it wouldn't. Guess who won!

There was an article last year, I think in the Guardian, about The RCA and art students. It said too many art students are treated like 'little geniuses' and too many people are getting into art school. Would be interesting to hear other people's thoughts on this!

Also I have been reading Adrian Mole, so good!

I would like some money.

I would like some money. Would anyone like to give it to me? I will never repay you but I will pimp you for the rest of my life.

How does this sound?

I've got Status Anxiety

Good Day!

Friday, wah! For some reason when it comes to Friday I feel very sad. I think because I know a week has ended and I think how I'm now that bit closer to death. This sounds like a very miserable thought but actually quite positive when you think about it!

Monday morning started badly with a mix up at the hospital which ended up in two doctors sticking things in parts of my body which I wasn't expecting. I cried. Not a good start to the week. I then went home and continued to finish this collage I'm working on, it's called 'I've got Status Anxiety'. And in this collage I've been putting together all these images of wonderful fantasy women and collating them to make a 1.5m x 1.5m wonder of suicide material. You see, on the outside you think these airbrushed, big titted beauties don't affect you. But then all of a sudden you've started taking Kelp again and decided you didn't really need dinner after all. 

I've been thinking about it more and more recently. I judged this poster competition the other week and the theme was feminism. One of the girls had put as her explanation 'Women are no longer seen as objects'. Now, I don't know what planet she's living on but it's certainly not the same one as I. All you have to do is look around and there is the evidence. For a young girl not to acknowledge this is worrying. But I think it could be that because we're so saturated with these images, we've become blind to them and blind to their connotations. Adverts are everywhere, we're blind to seeing a woman drenched in water advertising a mobile phone.  We're blind to music videos where our female stars of today are dancing in cages (I mean, come on, a fucking CAGE??). 

The main issue is sex. It's no surprise sex is used to sell absolutely everything. And the thing that worries me about this the most is that sex really is not a big deal. And by using it all the time to sell, it's being made into the most important thing in the world by advertisers, television shows etc. So the knock on affect here, the way it drips down into our youth culture - THAT is something that should be of concern.

Like I mentioned earlier, you don't think it's affecting you but it is, it's dripping into your subconscious ever so slightly. It's putting women in a place they should not be. Is sex really that important? I suppose it's not even sex is it, it's just a wank.

Maybe the world is being run by the need for wank material.

Now I would say I've become a relatively strong woman. Even though I have the off day here and there. But gone are the days when I looked at a skinny girl and felt that pang of envy or guilt that I was not like them. But what about the girls that aren't strong? 

I'm not really offering any sort of sense or conclusion here, just a huge, massive rant really. I could talk about this all day. All I'm doing is touching the surface of a huge problem. That's what a collage of porn does to you!!

In other news I just cannot stop listening to this excellent remix of Christian Bale going out of his tiny mind on the set of Terminator. He made a TOTAL A-hole of himself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTihsJQHt48

We can do it!

This is my new piece 'we can do it'. I love love love it. I keep wearing the t-shirt all the time though.

Myself, wood wank and Siamsa Gallery

Helloooo

On Wednesday I will be off to Ireland for the Dingle Film festival showing my film 'Who Would Wood Wank'. 

For those who have seen this film you will understand how very embarrassing it is for me to sit there and watch this projected on a large screen in front of a silent audience. Sometimes I run away, but then I can still hear the slopping and my own panting. You have to see the film. It was on Nick Knight's ShowStudio website last year as part of his politcal fashion project, but now you will only really catch it at an exhibition. So that's why you should all come to Ireland and hang out with me, haha!

I will also be doing a group show at the Siamsa Gallery in Tralee called 'Visions of God' which opens on the 9th September. There will be a party so if you are in this part of the world, do come along. Here's a link! http://www.siamsagallery.ie/

Ta and love! xxxxxxx